What began well quickly degenerated into utter chaos when everyone's eyes were closed. The prayer list had been read and several people had been called upon to pray. My head was bowed. My eyes were closed. My ears were hearing . . . thwock! I glanced up to see what had made this unusual sound over the reverential prayer being offered nearby. There was Sweet Pea making a quick return to the pew from the side aisle. Where had she been? And what was that funny noise I'd heard?
I waited but I did not close my eyes. There it was again -- Thwock! -- And there went Sweet Pea out of the pew once more to retrieve a ball made completely out of mini suction cups that was now rolling down the wall!
After some scuffling, a few hushed words of warning, and several frowns between the two of us, Sweet Pea sat peacefully next to me and I resumed an attitude of prayerful reverence.
It lasted about 10 seconds.
I peeked just in time to see Sweet Pea heave a ball of interwoven plastic tubing over the shoulder of the man seated ahead. I gasped and lunged for it. It felt like one of those slow motion moments from a baseball movie where the outfielder dives for the ball to save the win for the home team. Except there was no cheering crowd, I had neglected to bring my fielder's mitt that night, and I didn't land in a supine position on the outfield turf. Oh, yeah. I also didn't make the catch.
The ball missed the man but hit his pew and rolled under the one ahead of him. It sat mocking me with a light show triggered by its impact with the floor. I did manage to get Sweet Pea in my mitts just in time to keep her from sliding under the pews after it. There the ball remained until the man who almost got beaned returned it after church while graciously accepting my heartfelt apologies.
Sweet Pea made a hasty exit from the game soon after her windup and pitch was discovered by her
Too late.
