Guilt

This is the fifth lesson in the series on Biblically understanding the causes of depression.
The first lesson entitled "Perfectionism" can be found here.
The second lesson entitled "Futility" can be found here.
The third lesson entitled "Idolatry" can be found here.
The fourth lesson entitled "Worldliness" can be found here.


Do you have a past? Well, of course you do. And if you are like I am you probably have certain areas of it that you don’t want to revisit. Sometimes meeting a person from our past can cause depressing memories to surface. Sometimes that depression can result in fear over the consequences.

There are certain people I never want to meet again. Just the thought of running into them somewhere unexpectedly is enough to cause trepidation. It would be even worse knowing that someone I want to avoid is going to be present at an event I plan to attend. I am not hiding deep, dark secrets but there are some memories and events that I do not wish to relive.

If you have been following my devotions on depression then it might have occurred to you that I am working chronologically through the scriptures. By the time a reader of the Bible reaches Genesis 32 he or she has encountered the story of Jacob and Esau.

What a past Jacob had! Several years prior to the events of this chapter, Jacob had both cheated his brother out of the birthright reserved for the firstborn and had tricked their father, Isaac, out of the blessing that was intended for Esau. Jacob had fled as a result. He was someone who had good reason to avoid his brother.

But forever avoiding Esau proved to be impossible. After years of serving his father-in-law, Laban, he made the decision to return to his homeland. The decision was approved by God who visited Jacob in a dream. As the journey with wives, children, servants, and flocks progressed, depression descended upon Jacob as he realized that he must face the twin brother who had sworn many years earlier to kill Jacob at the first opportunity.

Messengers arrived with the news that Esau was coming to him with a troop of 400 men. The Bible says that Jacob was afraid and distressed. He divided the animals and people into two distinct bands so that if Esau’s army attacked one group the other one might have a chance to flee. Servants were dispatched with herds of animals. These were gifts that were meant to appease Esau’s anger.

The next few events recorded in scripture astound me. After Jacob dispatched the women and children with the herds and herdsmen, he remained alone. He prayed a heartfelt prayer requesting deliverance. It is one of the first signs of humility exhibited by Jacob.

That night, God Himself wrestled with Jacob. I have always been amazed at the way God answered Jacob’s prayer for deliverance. Instead of sending bands of angels to guard the camp or arming Jacob with superhuman strength, God weakened him. How can this be? Wasn’t Jacob weak enough? Evidently Jacob was not weak enough to suit God. The fight with God meant that Jacob would forever walk with a limp. He would not be able to do the task of defending himself or his family. Only God could be his defense from that point.

But God didn’t leave Jacob in shame. Not only did God make it so that Jacob had no choice but to trust God as his deliverer but He gave Him a new name as proof. No longer would he be known as Jacob, the Supplanter (or Deceiver) but Israel, the One God Fights For.

Guilt can be a horrible burden to bear. Even those who know that their sins are covered under the blood of Jesus Christ and have been given the new name of Christian sometimes fear the consequences of their guilt. Their accuser often reminds them of any shameful past deeds.

What can be done about things of the past? You can do nothing about them. However, if we turn the past over to God in humility He promises that there is no further consequence: “Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life.” John 5:24.

What are the steps for overcoming depression due to guilt?

First, confess your sins. It is very important to admit when you are wrong. A person who is not willing to confess when they are wrong has problems seeing the root of the problem. Don’t explain guilt away. Own it.

Second, repent of the sin. That means to determine not to do it again. We fail at this sometimes, but the intention should be to not do that wrong thing again.

Third, if possible, make restoration or make amends. Nothing says “I was wrong!” more than trying to set things right. Not every story ends with two people weeping on each other's neck like it did for Jacob and Esau but restoration and the humility that it exhibits can go a long way toward making that happen.

Fourth, accept forgiveness, even if only God forgives you. Don’t live with a cloud over you for the rest of your life.

Fifth, if the accuser of your soul whispers in your ear reminding you of your faults, you remind him of your forgiveness. This is where you allow God to fight your battles for you. If Satan himself cannot successfully accuse you why worry about your fellow humans?

Do not allow the past to spoil your present and future. Let God fight your battles for you. And if you meet the people from the past who knew the old you, make sure you introduce them to the new you. Like Israel you may forever walk with a limp but let it be a reminder that God is fighting your battles.