But there is one resolution that I think I will be able to make and keep in 2009. I think I will make it a goal to lose weight! What makes me think that I've found a diet that is foolproof (oh, that word again!)? I lost at least 3 lbs this holiday season! Compared to the usual December weight gain I think this is unprecedented.
How did I achieve such wonderful results?
My new diet should officially be called "The Teen-aged Boy in the House Diet." It appears to be an almost guaranteed aid to female weight loss! It costs a lot of money for food, but the results are spectacular! No pills to swallow - actually, little of anything to swallow at all - just cook and bake anything and watch it disappear before your eyes and behind your back! No counting calories, carbs, or fat grams.
I tried this and it actually worked! I made fudge, cookies, cakes, pies, cheese ball, dips, candy, and other goodies throughout December and still lost weight! Here is the simple plan:
- Make sure you have at least one teen-aged boy in your home. (Optional: twins cost more but accelerate the process. Or one boy with several friends visiting for a few hours will do the same.) Don't have even one teen-aged boy of your own? I know one you can borrow. His mother won't mind the help filling his stomach. There is very little chance of ruining his appetite anyway, so don't worry about that. He comes with no known food allergies and likes food from all of the major groups. He will burn up the calories he consumes quickly so don't be concerned if some of the food you feed him is junk. Be more concerned if you consume it. He can handle it. You, on the other hand, cannot.
- Prepare any or all of your favorite foods and desserts.
- Lick the bowls, spoons, beaters, and other utensils used in the process yourself so as not to feel deprived. This is very important because it may be the only taste of the actual food that you will sample.
- Bake or cook goodies as usual, then set them out to cool.
- Leave the room and let the diet work its magic. Any leftovers can be put out of sight in a cookie jar, refrigerator, or pantry. It doesn't seem to hinder the process. It might take a bit longer for some foods to disappear, but usually not more than two days.
This diet probably works for men, too, but the results have not yet been documented.
*Results in the previous testimonial are believed to be typical.
And I thought the Tigger-Sweet Pea diet was a guaranteed winner! (Take one bite, feed two bites to each child).
ReplyDeleteAll I want to know is: what are you putting in all that home cooking? Miracle-Gro? That boy is taller everytime I see him (twice a week).
That was too funny! Went through that stage when our youngest, the boy, was a teen. A bottomless pit I tells ya!
ReplyDeleteDon't try this with the teenage girls in our family. :) Even though we should be well past that picky eating stage, we aren't. Not to mention that we don't even like the same things. Our diets consist of mostly Ramon noodles and strawberries, just not at the same time. :) And we prefer to lick the beaters instead of eating the baked goods.
ReplyDeleteKelly brings up a valid point. This diet only works if you have a male teenager in the home. Like Kelly's household, mine once held three daughters. At their optimum ages living together they were 18, 15, and 11. Three adolescent females did not result in their mother losing any weight, except maybe from nerves. But that's another story entirely!
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